Listen and speak with a heart of love

Communication between two people can be difficult... one person has a background, education, life experiences, up bringing different than another so therefore will hear words spoken or read body language perhaps differently than they were sent.

It is so essential when communicating with another person that we listen past their words seeing their heart. "Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks." Matthew 12:33 Words can have many different meanings, but the intent of the communication is what we should be listening for.

Words can be misunderstood when the communication is based solely upon the words themselves. If we view those we love and who love us through eyes of love... we then would see the intent of their heart as they speak causing far less arguments and far greater understanding.

Often woundedness within ourselves causes communication breakdowns. Hurting people hurt people, albeit unintentionally we can hope. Knowing a person's inward wounds and sensitivities will allow us to extend grace and not take to heart when something they communicate doesn't quite sit right with us. Love covers a multitude of sins... let's believe the best of the person by extending grace and listening with a heart of love.

Hope this helps someone, felt compelled to write it tonight... even more so as Ministers, we need this reminder. Love and Grace, let that be the salt and pepper of your speech and heart as you communicate with others in your life.

1 Peter 3:9 "Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing." NIV

In Christ,
Pastor Sandy of www.raphactr.org

Sight in your scope....

So often we get distracted from what God has called us to, or in other words His purpose and plan for our life, by yielding to our flesh in managing things ourselves.  We think that if it is a good thing, then it must be God's direction for our life when often times it isn't. The enemy of our souls comes to side track us... he will whisper things that seems to be good, when they are just a little off God's plan. No, not totally off but just enough that you will miss your mark. 

Any of you ever shot a Bow with an arrow? In my new town folks here love to target shoot. Well, any marksman knows that if your scope is off by just a little the trajectory of the arrow or the bullet will be off by quite a bit. That's why it is important to sight in your gun before going hunting.... to make sure you hit your target, right?

God has called each of us for a unique purpose. His voice is known by His sheep but we must listen to hear Him.  Scripture says let him who has ears to hear, let him hear.  This means we must be in tune to Him, having a heart yielded to Him to hear Him. God is a Spirit, and speaks to our spirit.   Getting in tune to God is like sighting in your scope on a rifle... it allows you to take a better aim, as to not miss the goal or target.  Getting in tune to hearing God's voice takes time with Him, yes you will have some mistakes in which He is quick to forgive if you ask Him, but you press on in being yielded and teachable.

When we are not teachable, then we won't hear God as well.  We will stumble along, wondering why God isn't answering our prayers but in reality we are not lined up with God's Word, His will or His purpose for us. We are praying for things that aren't in His plan for us. Thank God, He doesn't answer all our prayers... for we surely would make more of a mess of our lives than we have.

Let's resolve to draw close to God and let Him teach us and let Him lead us through giving us His peace in our inner man. Setting our priorities based upon what He says do, not basing priorities on our thoughts or feelings or by what seems good.

Let's have ears to hear. 

In Christ, Pastor Sandy

Don't believe lies.... be vigilent!

As many of you know by now, I am a Board Certified Pastoral Counselor through the Board of Christian and Professional Pastoral Counselors, completing a dual Doctorate: Doctorate of Ministry and Biblical Counseling. My purpose in writing this Blog is to sound the alarm helping you to become aware of the devils wiles.

The devil seeks who he can steal from, kill or destroy.  He does not come in to your life so that you will recognize him easily but often comes as a subtle thought planted to lead you astray.  The enemy deceives people so that they actually believe the lies he plants... thinking they have truths when in reality they are believing thoughts that are sent to misguide them and hurt others in life. The Bible says that the serpent/devil is more subtle than all the other creatures in the garden.  God's Word also says we are to be as wise as serpents but gentle as doves, not pushovers by the enemy but aware of his deceptions.

The following story sadly is true, with names being withheld and some facts changed, to protect the identity of the parties. Recently, I had the opportunity to come to know a young woman with two children, who felt she was being abused by her husband. After a few years of marriage to him, she left him stating domestic violence/abuse. As a Pastoral Counselor versed in Domestic Violence issues, verbal abuse etc I listened to her story intently. I realized after talking with the husband and other close family members and friends who knew each person well, that she was deceived. In fact, she had committed adultery time after time using her perceived issues within herself to justify her violation of her marital commitment and then abandonment of the family.

The facts are that she had experienced some abusive violence in her home as a child.  She then transferred these feelings of abuse to her husband, believing that he was abusive like her family member had been when he was not, but quite the opposite. He graciously forgave her marital infidelities and her abandonment of himself and his children. He admitted that he was angry and hurt over her infidelities but chose to stay in the marriage praying for God to do a work in his wife's heart and soul.   

The devil chooses those he can manipulate to destroy others. He will use

misguided people with wounds to do his work.  How do we not only defend ourselves against such attacks but be on the offensive for those who are unaware of the devil's schemes?

The Bible says that we are to put on the whole Armor of God, to submit ourselves to God, resist the devil and he will flee.  God has also given us all authority over all the power of the enemy. But what does that mean?  The Armor of God is Jesus Christ, His atonement that bought us victory.  Submitting ourselves to God means to surrender who we are, lining up our lives with His Word, His promises... in other words, loving Him with all our heart, soul, mind and strength.

When Jesus left, He did not leave us as orphans but sent the Holy Spirit to guide us in to all truth.  As we yield ourselves to God's Word, keeping Him as our priority He says that He will direct our paths.  He will never leave nor forsake us, nor will He leave us alone to fight the enemy by ourselves, but has made us more than conquerors.

The next time you hear "gossip" or negativity about someone, be sure to see the truth through God's Word, not passing on the information but praying for the parties involved. As for yourself, stay close to Jesus, seek him with your whole heart, trust Him, stay in fellowship with a body of believers who are centered in God's Word, stay in His Word for Him to reveal truths to any wounds you may have and learn to recognize the enemies lies as he tries to plant them in you.

As for the woman with the issues, she is still living in deception, refusing to hear truths, seeks out only those who will agree with her about the lies she believes, has hardened her heart, continues to spread lies about her former husband and is a self proclaimed domestic violence spokesperson.  This is so sad, as she will lead many others astray through her deception, while she will not experience Christ's healing for herself.  As for the husband, he is living a productive life centered in Christ and has received healing through godly counseling.

What you do with this story is up to you... but the truth is that you must guard your heart and your mind.  Choose who and what you listen to.  Accept the devils evil thoughts or choose Christ's abundant life.  In all things pray, give grace and yes, love.

In Christ,

Pastor Sandy

Come on Christian's, Let's Love Each Other

Today was a day when you realize why the enemy makes headway sometimes with the lost. Our example as Christians may be the only Christ the non-believer ever sees or hears.  Don't you wish Christians would quit squabbling over scripture, and love one another even though many of us may be of different denominations, different doctrinal stances!  Seems to me that the greatest gift is love... you know "for God so loved", God is love, the love of Christ drove Him to the cross, etc. I think we should major in the majors and in all things, speak love to one another. I am not saying we should not know that which we believe nor that we are to be easily persuaded away from doctrinal truths.

I recently heard a song that says "They will know us by our love".  There are people (non-believers) out there who are watching us, some seeking truth, others seeking any reason to not know Christ.  What kind of witness is it when we bitterly argue with one another, speak evil of one another, tear each other apart.   Let's guard our speech and make it all acceptable before God, let's speak evil of no one, let's love one another even to the point that our love for one another causes the lost non-believer to desire this kind of love too.

Join me in making this a heart felt prayer... that Christ would help us love as He loved.. in thought, word and in deed. 

In Jesus Name, Pastor Sandy

Christ's Consecration

Consecration: literally means "setting apart".  What strikes me with such force when I think of Christ's sacrifice... is the setting apart of Himself to the task He had ahead of Him.  He exhibited singleness of focus... total consecration to the purpose He was born for...... to die.

He separated Himself from the Father, from all that heaven offered Him, from the love, from holiness, from all that is good.... to endure, to submit, to take on, to give up, to set apart Himself for us. 

Consecration.  He consecrated Himself to the purpose of His life.... for you, for me, in obedience to our Father. He endured the cross, despising the shame but for the joy set before Him .. he gladly submitted.

We are His joy.  We are His, bought with the price He paid.  As Resurrection Sunday approaches, let's consecrate ourselves as Jesus did. Consecration, a setting apart of our lives, and all that we are to Him... allowing Him to be who He is in us, bringing the joy and abundant life that Easter means! 

Pastor Sandy